So here’s a tip kids:
One career you might consider is being an Honest Auto Mechanic (no, “Honest Mechanic” is not always an oxymoron). You will never be without work. But as HerbO would say, “On the Other-Other Hand”, this is the one career path you should never ever consider.
Why?
Simple. Because, you could never retire — people will find out where you live and they’ll show up at your house.
I’ve known a few Good Honest Mechanics, most of whom I’d have to say are also Artists. I’m Rich! A Few Stories:
Ford Ranger Pickup
The Check-Engine Light was on, and it was running very rough. Brought it into the Ford Dealership and they said:
We’re going to have to replace the whole computer and some sensors, and even then we can’t guarantee that it will run well; and
You need a new rear axle bearing; and
Can we interest you in a new truck?
Looking at thousands of dollars, I called Bill, a tech at the Cyclotron where I worked and he said, “Tim, get your car out of there right now; bring it to Newt’s”, so I brought it to Newt at Newt’s Marathon (don’t bother trying to find his house — he’s been retired for at least 20 years) and he replaced one sensor and replaced the rear axle bearing seal. A couple hundred bucks. NEVER bring your car to a dealer for service.
Story 2: Subaru Forester Outback
I was up in Michigan and the exhaust system plain broke and was making all sorts of noise. Fortunately, I was right close to a Midas Shop, and they got me right in and had a very nice waiting area and free coffee. They gave me a beautiful computer-generated estimate complete with pictures and schematics, and said, “700-some dollars, and that’s IF we can salvage the catalytic converter” (so, imagine what the cost would have been and also think that this was a good 10 - 15 years ago!). I told them that I think I’ll wait till I get back to Indiana.
So, I brought it into this hole-in-the-wall place, and I think they’re still there (Bloomington Exhaust) and told them, “Look, this is an old car and I’m not sure it’s even worth the money to fix, but could you at least give me an estimate?” They put it up on the lift and said, “40$, 20 minutes”, and got out their saws and welders and went to work. Of course it was a shitload more than that since I also tipped them at least 40$.
Story 3: Toyota Prius
The Prius was still under warrantee, and I knew the wheel bearing had gone bad, so I brought it to the dealer. They replaced the brakes (700$), and then found that it was indeed the wheel bearing which I had already told them was the problem, and then they replaced the wheel bearing for “free”, and those brakes would have lasted me at least another 100,000 miles the way I drove that thing! And, if I really needed new breaks, sometime WAY in the future, which I never did, a Good Honest Mechanic would have done it for a fraction of the cost. Did I ever say “NEVER bring your car to a dealership, EVEN IF IT’S UNDER WARRANTEE?”.
Yeah, when I was young and rode bicycles everywhere, including across the country, I swore on the Bible that I’d never own a car and just ride bicycles, which I can easily repair myself. Well, I’m very glad that I now have a nice late model AWD Subaru that can get up and down the road to my house, and even up my drive in the winter (neglecting a week here or there every once in awhile), and am very glad I know a very good auto mechanic. Like I said, “I’m rich”.
And, just something to think about:
Why do people Drive their cars on Parkways, and Park their cars on Driveways?
Go Figure. It sure is a crazy world.
Like, e.g., this MSM Hyped-Hysteria Mass Psychosis CoVid-1984 Fear-Epidemic. But, it’s always been pretty crazy (e.g., in high school, during the Vietnam War [or the American War as they like to call it] I had a draft card with A-1 in my wallet; or go talk to Galileo, or all the people that marched off to all those wars, or talk to the Mayans …). And, as my brother DavE likes to tell me, just because the world is Crazy doesn’t mean that you too aren’t also Crazy.
That too is something to think about.
I hesitate to say this, but I feel like sentimentality is leading you astray. Do you really want to advise the kiddos in our circle to pursue careers in which they earn $40 on a sales lead (for which competitors are earning thousands)?
If market conditions encouraged honesty and cost effectiveness, there would be more honest auto mechanics already. Don't send our poor kids into a manic, cocaine-addicted house party to sell health food, armed with innocent ideas about civility.
This is Weimar Germany (not clear if East or West yet). Tell the kids to learn hot air ballooning, tunneling/mining, backyard farming, cryptography, small-scale electronics manufacturing, contraband smuggling, long range rifle shooting...
😉
Tim, thanks for the advice and the laughs!